Buckminster Skeeter: Wanna buy a watch?

Monday, December 19, 2005

Filled with the Christmas Spirit

Since it's almost Christmas I'll be kind and considerate with today's post.

Nah, Fuck it!

Let's talk about bums and Christmas. Bums traditionally have no home, few possessions, and are prone to mental disorders. There are many who have little control over their circumstances - mainly through mental illness or neglect from their family. I feel pity and sorrow for these poor souls. I wish I could help them. The problem is weeding out all the pathetic pieces of human waste who are mixed in. Bums who fully deserve to be where they are. There has to be a 'bottom of the barrel' in every species and they fit the bill. EVERYONE can't be successful and make it through life by adhering to the rules, amassing possessions and wealth, treating others fairly well, and making the right choices at least 1/3 of the time. There must be some that fall behind - that's the nature of getting ahead - you have to have something to be 'ahead' of. Some genes MUST be left out of the gene pool - that's the nature of Selection, Survival of the Fittest, etc... Again - I'm not talking about those who have no control over their circumstances. I don't spit on bums and shun them automatically because I don't know each and every one of them personally.
But here's the question. What do bums think about Christmas? They don't have shit anyway so are they upset about not getting any presents? Are they extra-jealous of us this time of year?

I think they're just as happy as we are. Not because THEY have the Christmas Spirit but because WE have the Christmas Spirit. You see a ratty old bum wearing a Santa hat and you think - "ah, look.... He's in the Christmas Spirit even though he's a bum". Then you hand him a buck or two because he put forth an effort to get into the societal moment. Later that night another bum, with no Santa hat, will fight him for that hat. He knows it's a ticket to extra handouts. I saw one the other day with a sign that said "Everyone deserves a Merry Christmas". This particular guy is a pro. He's at the same busy intersection every few days at rush hour. Last month he had the same sign that said "Everyone deserves a Happy Thanksgiving". You could actually see where he changed the words on his sign. I throw him a buck every know and then - at least he has a strategy.
Here's a thought: If a bum asks you for money this week get him to sing a Christmas Song or two. If he can belt out "Frosty the Snowman" and stay somewhat on key I'll give him some dough. Ask them to name Santa's Reindeer for 5 bucks. Or to recite "The Night Before Christmas". 'Tis the season for bums to get enterprising.

But, unfortunately, most will just hold out their hand.

Be kind to a bum this Christmas. It'll make you feel good even though they'll probably spend it on booze or crack. At least you give them the gift of a buzz.


Blogger Dr. Metal said...

Hubris will be punished! Shame on you, BuckySkeet.

9:22 AM  

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