Buckminster Skeeter: Wanna buy a watch?

Friday, February 03, 2006

Get to know Bucky

Some things I have recently learned about myself.

1) I know virtually nothing about 'Pop Culture'. I receive Rollingstone Magazine for some reason - I don't know why. I never signed up for it, I never requested it. It just shows up every week or so. Just for the hell of it I keep it in the downstairs shitter for BM reading material. I can flip through 100 or so pages and not recognize a single musician, artist, or otherwise famous person. Am I old now. Did I cross a line a few years ago that excluded me from being a part of the 'hip' scene? I must have. Now that I think about it the only era that I had a decent knowledge of Pop culture was the 80's. I knew all the pop musicians even if I thought most of them sucked. It occurred to me that maybe you have to be a teenager to know all that stuff - but I know several adults who throw around these pop names all the time. On TV some broad will be interviewed and I say "who's that". My wife says "You know.. She's married to so and so and sings that song blah blah." I do not know. Even after reading the Rolling Stone I still don't know.
2) I like fruit but don't enjoy eating it. Eating fresh fruit usually requires work - it's a chore. You gotta peel this, skin that, take the seeds out, cut it, de-stem it, etc... Fruit cocktail is great though. No work involved - except for my wife who does all the cutting etc.. An apple or pear is ok. No prep involved. But you gotta get up and throw it away immediately. You can't place it on a table - it gets juices and such everywhere.
3) When faced with the decision to watch Dancing With the Stars or re-organize my sock drawer I will always choose the latter.
4) Skin tags have started appearing on my body. On the eyelids, under an arm. They are strange little things aren't they. Very out of place, unwanted, skin crashers. I read on WebMD (a great website - you no longer need a doctor. Visit this site and cure yourself) that a doctor would simply cut them off. No big procedure or anything. So the other day I took some fingernail clippers, lined up a nice one on my eyelid and SNIP. Didn't even hurt that bad - well, not for long anyway. Self diagnosis and treatment. Try it!
5) I always lean to the left when I fart while seated. Has there been a study on this choice?
6) I have only recently noticed the difference between diagnosis and prognosis.
7) When I see someone driving a large truck I automatically assume they are a redneck. Not sure why - really - I know a lot of people who drive big trucks who are not rednecks. Yet I cannot help but make that automatic assumption. Whatever happened to gun racks? Used to be you rarely saw a Ford F150 without one. Have they been outlawed. The axe handle in the gun rack is one of my personal favorite Auto Accessories.
8) I get very irritated and anxious when watching someone use a computer or surf the net when they are not as proficient at it as myself. Especially when I have to talk someone through something on the phone - this happens all the time - family members call me weekly - somehow I became the computer expert in the family. "Bucky, how do I attach a picture to an email?". "Do you see your email?" "YES" "Do you see a paper clip icon?" "YES" "click it". "OK, now what" "Do you see a 'browse' icon" BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH.
9) I enjoy giving donations for charities but always assume that someone is going to steal that money before the orphans or disabled people get it.
10) Living around Dr. Metal all those years has me addicted to making lists of things. I list everything now. If not on paper, in my mind. 'Nice touchdown catch' - hmmm what are my top 10 favorite touchdown catches..... Dr. Metal and I used to have a list, on large poster board, that was taped to the wall in our living room. Anytime we saw a commercial that offended us or we just plain didn't like we wrote down the company name on the board - they would not be receiving our business - ever. I have stuck to that all these years. My wife bought me some jeans from the GAP a few weeks ago. NO WAY - take 'em back - I will not endorse that brand, period.


Blogger Dr. Metal said...

My list of lifetime bans includes the Gap (and all of its subsidiaries: Banana Republic and Old Navy), People magazine, and Xicohtencatl, that price-gouging money-hungry Mexican restaurant located at 50 Stockbridge Road in Great Barrington, Massachusetts (413-528-2002). It also includes all awards shows (though I reserve the right to make an exception of the Heisman trophy presentation if an Alabama guy is up for serious consideration) and Everybody Loves Raymond.

10:00 AM  
Blogger mugwump said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:59 PM  
Blogger Buckminster Skeeter said...

What the fuck are you talking about? Your 'serious' blog has neither been mentioned here nor has it been - to my knowledge- read by either Dr. Metal or myself.

Everything doesn't have to be funny - it just works out that way.

5:26 PM  
Blogger Buckminster Skeeter said...

By the way - I don't write to inform, educate, or show-off my intelect. I write to entertain myself and anyone else who happens to get a chuckle.

Dr. Metal, on the other hand, has written some brilliant pieces on Cedars, moon phases, and the decline of personal contact in our daily lives.

5:45 PM  

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